Top tips to make sex more pleasurable
By Sara Twogood, MD
Vaginal penetration alone is NOT enough for women to feel the extent of their sexual pleasure. Eighty-five percent of women need to have clitoral stimulation to orgasm. This means that a sex toy or finger or penis inside the vagina, and ONLY inside the vagina, is missing the mark (literally and figuratively).
Want to know our top tips to make penetration more pleasurable?
I bet. Here they are:
1. Change positions
Really listen and feel your body to see what position is the best for you. Take into account how the traditional sex positions feel (such as missionary, cowgirl, doggy style) in addition to other positional and movement techniques. OMGYES (a website with tons of sex positive information) did a research study that I discussed in another post. The consensus from this research is that movements like rocking, angling the hips higher, shallowing (having the toy / finger / penis thrust shallow instead of deep), and clitoral stimulation with a finger or toy during vaginal penetration can all maximize sexual pleasure.
2. Communicate.
Think of a crazy good massage. The masseuse cannot possibly know the firmness of pressure you like or the spots that need extra attention on your body without you communicating that to them! Sure, you can get a great massage without communicating, especially if the masseuse is very intuitive or just lucky and gets it just right. But if you direct them, with words or noises or physical responses, the massage will be SO MUCH BETTER. Now take this lesson and apply it to your partner. They WANT you to feel good during sex. Tell them how!
3. Solo foreplay.
If you know, or hope, you’re going to have sex later, start gearing up a few hours before, solo. Read a sexy novel (try this series if you haven’t dug in yet). Daydream about having sex your partner (or a college crush, or a hot movie star, whatever works for you). Touch your body in a sensual way – not to orgasm, but to build sexual tension. By the time sexy time rolls around, your body and mind will be so, so ready to engage.
4. Lube.
We’ve said it a million times before and I’m here to say it again. The amount of vaginal lubrication present is not a reflection on arousal of a female body. Get rid of the idea slippery, feel good sex is all up to the female vagina’s natural lubricating mechanism. Use lube as a sexual enhancement regardless – you won’t regret it.